Love & Parole Officers
by adustyframe ~ January 17th, 2007Give me such love for God and men,
as will blot out all hatred and bitterness.
Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Our ladies Bible study is doing Becoming a Women of Purpose by Cynthia Heald (not purpose driven by the way)
Several of these last quotes I posted were from this study and they were thoughts I needed to mull over more than just a one time read.
I read this one this morning.
Give me such love for God and men,
as will blot out all hatred and bitterness.
I underlined all.
God is doing such a wonderful work in our home. In me. In my husband. In our son.
We are far different people than we were a few years ago.
I know 100% for sure that all of these things that have occurred are being used by God as tools to conform us and make us usable.
My heart is soft and I strive to be the woman that God wants me to be. I have more faith than I ever did. I see God work on a daily basis.
Yet at times there are pricklings of anger and bitterness that rise in my heart.
One point of contention has been the parole officers.
My husband has had no less than 4 different officers throughout his case.
The first parole officer told me that everything was my fault since I was his wife.
Talk about shooting the wounded.
Another accused me of being a poor mother. (And worse! You can read about that here.)
She also let it be known that she is angry at me for remaining married to my husband.
I am completely unsure of her motivations in this regard. I am fairly sure it is none of her business.
She has never met me.
Parole officers have done things that baffle EVERYONE that looks at this case.
The current officer has lied and even been caught lying in court under oath.
We won that case and thought my husband was on his way home.
She is the reason for the appeal that we are currently waiting for. She appealed our win and it was overturned. Her appeal was not factual and important details were left out or changed. (This is a post for another day.)
She told my husband that she is above the judge.
She is not, although she behaves like she is.
So we wait for a decision on this appeal. And wait. And wait.
I said to my mother in law,
“Wouldn’t it be something if God used us to bring her to him and we all ended up friends?”
(Just to clarify I don’t really “want” to be her friend. I am very displeased by her actions. She actively participated in tearing our family apart.)
My mother in law. The sweet godly older lady snorted! We both rolled our eyes and laughed.
I felt a check in my spirit. This parole officer is not beyond God’s grace.
Earlier this week, someone gave me a newspaper article about a crooked parole officer. He works in the same office that my husband’s officer is in.
I laughed about how much fun he must be having in jail. I’m sure that his fellow inmates are going to give him an incredibly difficult time.
I also wished that a condition of his plea would have been to snitch on the rest of the office.
I am more than certain that he isn’t the only one with issues.
But back to this morning.
I read that quote and the Lord reminded me of my laughing over this person’s sin.
My sense of satisfaction over the treatment he will probably receive.
My moments of anger at my husband’s parole officer that cloud the real need.
The real need for this woman is Jesus.
She desperately needs him.
When I stop and think about what she has done, I know that she is only acting as someone who has never felt the love and grace of Jesus in her life.
I pray that I will allow God to truly give me a love for him and others that leaves no room for anger or bitterness.
Not even for parole officers.
January 17th, 2007 at 10:48 pm
You know what I’ve learned? No matter what is said or done against us the truth always comes out in the end. I’m so glad that God is working in your hearts and your home.
January 18th, 2007 at 4:25 am
“Becoming a Women of Purpose by Cynthia Heald (not purpose driven by the way)” is an EXCELLENT study. I loved it. I deal with low-paid state and municipal chair holders all day [there are some EXCELLENT workers in these places too!!) and I know what a pain they are. Happily none of my dealing involve my family [but have in the past]. I am praying for you.
January 18th, 2007 at 5:27 am
hi, this was very convicting for me. May God bless you. Thank you.
January 18th, 2007 at 5:56 am
Lizzie, i want to share somethings with you. first, i do NOT believe God only gives us what we can handle. i believe God gives us what we cannot handle to find out who we are – will we totally depend on Him or will we turn and run. and yes, it is spiritual warfare, but look what Jesus is doing for us, He is praying for us!
Luke 22:31-34 “‘Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat. But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers.’ But he replied, ‘Lord, I am ready to go with you to prison and to death.’ Jesus answered, ‘I tell you, Peter, before the rooster crows today, you will deny three times that you know me.’”
so, we think that peter failed because he DID deny Jesus three times. but look at THIS!
“Peter replied, ‘Man, I don’t know what you’re talking about!’ Just as he was speaking, the rooster crowed. The Lord turned and looked straight at Peter. Then Peter remembered the word the Lord had spoken to him: ‘Before the rooster crows today, you will disown me three times.’ And he went outside and wept bitterly.”
see what peter did – he wept bitterly – he saw his humanity, who he was, who he was not, and it broke him! that is GOOD!!! imagine had he not had this response? he might have looked like judas.
and because peter wept over his humanity, look at some of what Jesus did just for peter!
John 21:15-19 “When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, ‘Simon son of John, do you truly love me more than these?’ ‘Yes, Lord,’ he said, ‘you know that I love you.’ Jesus said, ‘Feed my lambs.’ Again Jesus said, ‘Simon son of John, do you truly love me?’ He answered, ‘Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.”‘ Jesus said, ‘Take care of my sheep.’ The third time he said to him, ‘Simon son of John, do you love me?’ Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, ‘Do you love me?’He said, ‘Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.’ Jesus said, ‘Feed my sheep. I tell you the truth, when you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.’ Jesus said this to indicate the kind of death by which Peter would glorify God. Then he said to him, ‘Follow me!’”
Jesus did not do this for Jesus, He did this for peter b/c He knew peter needed it. Jesus trusted peter enough to let satan sift him like wheat; Jesus prayed for peter b/c He also knew peter could not go thru it without Jesus; and Jesus needed peter to know where his “breaking point” was, to know that together peter could overcome that breaking point, because Jesus had some VERY powerful plans for peter, and He needed peter to know peter would NEVER be alone – and He needed peter to know his humanity and his God who overcame his humanity.
also, Jesus felt need to tell peter about his own death. why? i don’t know the mind or ways of God, but i wonder. peter knew now that death was NOT the worst thing that could happen to him because death did not separate him from God. peter now knew that the life chosen for him would require sacrifice but he would not be required a greater sacrifice than Christ for peter – nor one that Jesus would not be with him through.
do you think, lizzie, maybe, that God allowed satan to sift you as wheat? that you did not necessarily “fail” but that you found you could not do this, it was more than you could bear, it was truly your “breaking point.” and God trusted you enough to allow you to go “there.” and not only that, you did NOT stay there, you immediately turned to God and wept bitterly. i can almost hear God say to you, “now, lizzie; now I can use you. now you know who you are and who you’re not; and now you know who I Am.”
see, i have a very dear friend who got to this place – and “rightfully” so. we all got to this place when we truly desire God to use us – where we want to shake our fists at God. it’s not so much that we get to this place, it’s what we do after God opens our eyes to the truth we discover in this place. my dear friend continued on her journey of shaking her fist at God. i do not know where she is now, but i do know her four children were really, really messed up at the time, and it breaks my heart b/c they were as my own children. she could have chosen as you and peter, but she did not.
you chose what is best. now God can use you. Jesus never left you; he prayed for you. satan had to ask permission to drive you to that place – and God gave it to him. satan thought he had won, but he did NOT win!!! satan thought he was in control, but he never was! God trusted you enough to allow satan to sift you, but God knew your humanity enough that Jesus also prayed for you and NEVER left you. God knew you could not handle it; He knew you would break and question your faith. and God also knew that without this moment in time in your life, you could never be as strong as you are now. you saw your humanity for what it was – totally dependent on Jesus Christ – and you turned to Him. and He smiled upon you. and God is picking you up and doing great and mighty things through your willing life!!! would you be able to pray for this parole officer; would you “know that she is only acting as someone who has never felt the love and grace of Jesus in her life” had you not found out that, “but for the grace of God go I?” who better to show this woman the love of Christ than you? you may not know if God’s love for her lived out through you will ever lead her to Christ till you are in heaven, but you do know that your life is a vessel to reach the sick and the lost.
what an amazing gift you are, lizzie!!!!! all glory and honor and praise to God!!!!!!!
January 18th, 2007 at 5:56 am
I see God work on a daily basis.
Thanks for pointing that out to us…..prayers and gratitude for finding your site….becky
January 18th, 2007 at 6:44 am
One of the things God has been teaching me since last summer is:
TO forgive even when the offending party is not seeking forgiveness nor believes that they have any reason to be forgiven.
It’s much more challenging than if the person were to humbly offer their apology and vocalize how wrong they were, but it’s still necessary in order that no root of bitterness make its home in our hearts.
It’s been tough, but through Christ, all things are possible! He’s been softening my heart and giving me love for those who have offended.
I’ll pray for the parole officer!
January 18th, 2007 at 8:12 am
Glad to hear you feel and respond to the “checks in your spirit”. And yes, I also have seen how much we laugh at sin, and am troubled by it.
January 18th, 2007 at 8:40 am
This surely is a thought that is not popular with the world! But with this kind of living, it’s sure to lead to success with God. Bless you!!!
January 18th, 2007 at 9:28 am
wow! I have recently become more aware of the natural man still rearing its ugly head in my life & the life of other Christians. The “they got what they deserved” attitude, The “it’s not my problem” attitude & The “it’s about time God squashed them” attitude.
Thank you for providing a solution – this is truly a quote worth repeating, along with Scriptures.
Give me such love for God and men,
as will blot out all hatred and bitterness.
~ Dietrich Bonhoeffer
January 18th, 2007 at 12:19 pm
Came by to say hello, and wow–what a blessing you are to me! Good quote by Bonhoeffer, too. God bless you, dear one.
January 18th, 2007 at 8:14 pm
Thank you all so much for your thoughts and prayers.
Sometimes I hold my breath when I publish a post. Just because I pray that I come across with my true heart. Not whining or complaining but just saying “This is what’s going on.”
I appreciate your input very much!
Thanks
January 19th, 2007 at 11:38 am
She may think she is above the Judge….but not above the Judge of all the earth. Thank God that He is over all this,and may she come to see her need of Him.