Statistically
by adustyframe ~ June 25th, 2007Statistically my son is at risk for a troubled youth.
Children in fatherless homes are more apt to be involved in drugs, pre-marital sex, and other risky behaviors.
Children of incarcerated fathers are at higher risk for being incarcerated themselves.
I was doing some research this weekend. Part of my “ducks in a row” I mentioned in the previous post.
The statistics are depressing.
I shut off the computer and prayed,
“Dear God, please please do not let James be affected by this. Please dear God don’t ever let him turn from you.”
I look at him often and wonder how he truly feels in his heart.
I look at pictures of him as a very small boy and wonder if he was happier then?
I’ve sat with my scrapbooks and looked from a photo of a smiling 3 year old boy and looked up at the big boy my son now is.
I wonder how many changes he’s experienced that I’ll never truly know?
Is he really ok? Is he able to talk to me about things? Is this ruining him?
I have to trust God that he will shelter my son’s heart and grow him into a godly young man.
I have to pray for God to rule in my son’s heart.
I have to train my son in habits and disciplines that will keep his feet on the path that God has for his life.
When I realized this incarceration was going to hit our family, I remember praying and my heart’s cry was “But what about my baby, Lord!?”
I was reading and studying and journaling verses he brought to my attention.
One passage I read was
Isaiah 44:3-4
For I will pour water upon him that is thirsty, and floods upon the dry ground: I will pour my spirit upon thy seed, and my blessing upon thine offspring:
And they shall spring up as among the grass, as willows by the water courses.
I pray that he pours his spirit and blessing on my offspring and that my son will spring up a godly man.
June 26th, 2007 at 8:59 am
Dr. Ben Carson, in his book “Think Big” tells how one single mom [his!!] beat the odds and raised her son to be a world famous brain surgeon. It was simple–more Church, more books, less free time. I say “simple” with a laugh, for I am in the boat with you on this one. The Carson boys were required to read a library book every week. No tv on school nights. Church whenever there was a service. Chores. Don’t despair. I’m praying and so are the others out there swimming with us against the tide.
June 26th, 2007 at 3:12 pm
There’s a big difference between the “statistics” and your son. You both have God and the power of prayer.
June 26th, 2007 at 7:20 pm
*Please* don’t think I’m minimizing your worries when you read my comment…
)
It is soooooo hard not to worry about our babies’ futures…boy do I know! But you are doing an *awesome* job bring up James with a solid Christian foundation. You are modeling good Christian behaviors for James . I continue to be impressed with the creative ways Lee remains involved with traveling puzzles, schoolwork,and artwork despite being apart. That will always be special to James. I really think James will beat the odds. Your family is not like most incarcerated families…God is truly on your side on this one Lizzie!
June 26th, 2007 at 9:43 pm
Lizzie, you are doing an incredible job of raising your son to beat the odds. It’s hard when you see such depressing statistics, but your son is a living testimony of your faith and trust in God.
June 26th, 2007 at 10:31 pm
You don’t know me, but I’ve been reading your blog awhile now. I have so much respect for you and your family, and your parenting, and your faith in God. You are a rock – not just for your son and husband, but also for many readers. When I say rock, I mean that you are continually faithful to our King no matter how unclear your path is currently. There is no finer example for women and mothers today than yours.
I teach Criminal Justice and Legal Studies at a Christian University, and I know exactly what statistics you are talking about. It is the subject for many of my classes. I also want you to know that you absolutely do not fall into the same category as those that are the subject of these statistics. You don’t even come close – you have the one key that these others do not have, and that is Jehovah God, who is providing you with a network/church family that will enable you, your husband, and your precious son to beat the odds. Statistics are nothing in the face of God. From now on, when I pray for my little boys, I will pray for yours, too. Grace and peace to you.
June 27th, 2007 at 2:31 am
Statistically most little boys don’t have a mother and father who love the Lord and pray for their son. I know we can take nothing for granted, but if James has to have his daddy in prison ,he is blessed to have a mummy like you….and a daddy who will be faithful to the Lord when he finally gets home.
July 6th, 2007 at 10:30 am
My brother and I had a tough time with our Dad’s incarceration. I think we would have been better off if we had known Jesus personally. the other thing that really is a hangup for my brother still, is a distrust/dislike of police officers and those in authority. you see as kids we blamed the authorities for “putting” our dad in jail.
I think you and your husband are showing your son that taking responsibility for ones actions is hard and necessary and helps one become a more mature person. I agree that you don’t fit the “statistics”
from a “statistic” whom Jesus rescued,
Mrs Nehemiah