Aww
by adustyframe ~ September 15th, 2007Lee sent me another card today. It has some cute little kids and watercolor flowers.
He wrote,
“I wanted to write you and tell you that I apologize for all those hurtful things that I’ve said and done to you.
With all sincerity from the bottom of my heart. I was selfish and self-centered.
I love you.”
He had tried to apologize for specific things. Sometimes I wondered though if he really got it?
Did he really know how much he hurt me?
I didn’t think there was a way to make him understand it without hurting him! If I rubbed his face in it and poured out any hurt and grief he caused me, I’d wound him.
(You know how we women KNOW how to wound our husbands right?) I didn’t want to go there.
It was a temptation sometimes. I wanted him to hurt too.
God is good to mend and heal all these hurts and wounds.
I knew Lee was selfish and self-centered. It was nice to hear him say that–without my prompting him to say it.
These letters and admissions and apologies and recognitions of the pain he caused are healing for me.
It’s another evidence of the work God has truly done in his heart.
September 16th, 2007 at 12:10 pm
It is true, we can wound our loved ones so easily- and it doesn’t take much. A snide comment, a snort of laughter at the wrong time- and never done out of love but out of frustration. When we first got married I was very home sick and depressed (not cos I was married!
I made my husband cry- that was so bad. I have made him sigh. And you know what? I thank God for him because he never rubbed my nose in my own failings. May the Lord continue His great work of sanctification in us all- and I am so looking forward to the day when you can post of your life together as a family- it will take some getting used to for all of you but by God’s grace I believe it will be a thing of great beauty.
Susanna, I can’t wait until we’re a family again. Yes, I’ll have to blog about the adjustments! That will be a whopper.