Battling Discouragement
by adustyframe ~ December 9th, 2007The week that I closed my store was full of discouragement. I was physically exhausted and had much work to do. And even though I know I am in God’s will, it was still an emotional time.
Things happened in rapid succession.
Angry words hurled at me, family members being inconsiderate, things in my personal life, things at church.
Christmas without Lee adds to the difficulty. I am a very “sappy” person, so having a hole in my family at Christmas wears down my already weary heart.
I was in a pit for a few days. I apparently haven’t completely healed and wrapped myself totally in Jesus, because today something happened again that made me so tired.
I can only attribute the ever present discouragement to the fact that in the past week, I took some very huge steps in obeying the Lord.
Satan doesn’t like that you know? I think he’d prefer me to stay in this hole of discouragement rather than trust the Lord and not care about what people say or do to me.
The truth is that while I must keep my eyes on Jesus, I am continually blown away by the really rude things people say or how people treat me (and others). Because even when I am praising God, it still hurts.
I was praying yesterday, asking God for direction. Wondering out loud how it is that he’s going to lead me in the near future.
“My God shall supply all your needs” came to mind as it has every time that I’ve worried about finances throughout this trial. That verse was quickly followed by, “He is able to do exceeding abundantly above all we ask or think.”
Then “No good thing will he withhold to them who walk uprightly.” Others verses came to my mind and I know they were brought to mind by the Holy Spirit.
I shocked myself with the following thought: (but God is big enough to shoulder our doubts and frustrations isn’t he?)
I said, “God sometimes when I hear these verses it feels like you’re taunting me because I don’t SEE it.”
I don’t want to share that with you, but I’ve said from the beginning that I want to be honest here. I don’t ever want anyone to think that I feel I’ve “arrived”.
I have not and God has so much work to do in my life.
I don’t have to stay here though. That is one thing I’ve learned through the growth God has allowed. I can have doubts and hurts. I can be tired and frustrated. I can tell God I don’t SEE it. But I don’t have to stay there.
I went on to pray as tears came to my eyes, “I know God that you aren’t taunting me. I KNOW that you have my good in mind. I know that you have taken care of us and will continue to do so. I choose to praise and I choose to put my eyes on you.”
This is the key. Choosing. It may be an hourly choice to keep my eyes on God. But it’s a choice.
God is so big and so good and he will never let me down. That’s why I place my faith in him and not in those around me. They will (and have and often do) let me down, but God never does.
Even when I don’t SEE it.
December 10th, 2007 at 12:44 am
i’m sorry people can be so mean. its a bad reflection on them, not you. I pray that the Lord will continue to give you the ability to forgive and not dwell on these horrid actions and bring good people around you to encourage you.
Thanks, Debby.
December 10th, 2007 at 4:14 am
Praying for you. Also sending a bushel of hugs your way. He will guide and He will provide.
Thank you, Beth.
December 10th, 2007 at 6:47 am
You know…you really touched a nerve with me with this post. I just want you to know that you are not alone in your human frailty. I’ve been struggling with a sense of hopelessness for several weeks now and have determined not to listen to my feelings any more but to remember the scriptures when the discouragement comes (not at all easy!).
My daughter lost her best friend to cancer at the end of May (she was 8), then we were blessed with a pregnancy we thought could never happen only to lose the baby at 11 weeks in August, and in the middle of it our church closed…leaving us without like-minded fellowship. All of these things together often cause me to feel as though God is punishing us, but I struggle to remind myself that He means these things for our good much as He did with Joseph’s trials in Egypt.
Praying for you today! Thank you for reminding me that I’m not the only one struggling against the flesh. (((HUGS)))
Melanie in KS
Melanie, I’m sorry for the losses you’ve faced this year. Thank YOU for letting me know I’m not the only struggling against the flesh. It’s good for us to encourage one another and be honest about our weaknesses.
December 10th, 2007 at 7:33 am
I needed to hear that today.
Thanks for letting me know. And for stopping in again!
December 10th, 2007 at 8:29 am
I was reading about Peter last night, and why His faith failed when he was walking on the water. He obviously had great faith, or he wouldn’t have stepped out in the first place, and his faith returned as he began to sink and he cried out to be saved. One of the reasons given was because he was in a new environment- out of the boat, into the water. You are out of your store and into the unknown. Although the other reasons are good I won’t quote them at you as I don’t want it to sound like I think you are doing those things!
Though dark be my way
Since he is my guide
Tis mine to obey
Tis His to provide
Though cisterns be broken
And creatures all fail
The word he has spoken
Shall surely prevail.
Thank you for that quote. Do you know who it’s by? That was a big encouragement to me today!
December 10th, 2007 at 8:57 am
Hugs, Lizzie – big ones…….
Thank you very much.
December 10th, 2007 at 4:27 pm
Just wanted to let you know that I am praying for you! Rebekah
Thank you!
December 10th, 2007 at 4:47 pm
Oh my. Lizzie, you’ve made all the points I would have made — it’s so much harder, though, to “see” with our hearts what we “know” in our heads!!
A month ago, I was praying in a similar way, struggling to trust God. I then opened my Bible to pray a Psalm (ever do that just to praise when you don’t know what to say?) and the following leapt off the page and into my heart like a bolt of electricity: Psalm 62:8: Trust in him at all times, O people;
pour out your hearts to him,
for God is our refuge.
Selah
It was VERY personal, and very powerful. I think that is a word for you, too. Two very encouraging commands in one sentence!
It’s not just words, no matter what our circumstances. He really does care, and wants you to share your concerns and yes, even doubts with Him. One of the great ways He will encourage you is through people He will put in your life, who will be there to encourage you at just the time when you need it most. Stay close to your church family, even though some of them may be rude!
I am praying for you guys, and really hope you have a nice Christmas holiday.
(((HUGS)))
Marie
Marie, thank you for your Biblical encouragement and hugs.
I have that verse written on the paper next to my mirror!
December 10th, 2007 at 6:43 pm
This probably isn’t a popular opinion, but I’ll share it anyway… While I wholeheartedly agree that God is all we need, I also think that some days, our human hearts need the comfort and security and safety of another human heart. God created us to need other people or He wouldn’t have encouraged us so strongly to seek out the fellowship of other believers. I think it’s perfectly acceptable to want the compassion and kinship of those around us, to want those closest to us to be supportive, with unconditional love. And I also think that if people say they never get discouraged or sad or lonely or … on and on … then I think they’re probably not being completely honest with themselves.
You hang in there. And know that if I were closer, I’d drive right over and give you a hug. And a Starbucks chai latte.
Chel, even your cyber hug and offer of a Starbucks is great;) Thanks. You’re right about people who say they never get discouraged. There is a balance in staying in the mire and using life as an excuse and just being honest and saying, “some things are just hard”
December 11th, 2007 at 6:05 pm
Well, you hang in there. Blessedly, while God doesn’t promise to protect us from the hard times, He does suggest that all of live won’t be made up of hard times.
Thanks for the reminder. Joy comes in the morning right?