Comments on: Questions http://adustyframe.com/2008/12/01/questions/ I blog about what God is teaching us while my husband is in prison. Sat, 31 Jul 2010 07:22:41 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.5 hourly 1 By: Katherine http://adustyframe.com/2008/12/01/questions/comment-page-1/#comment-69941 Katherine Sat, 06 Dec 2008 06:25:38 +0000 http://adustyframe.com/?p=1637#comment-69941 I am glad to hear that Lee's offense had nothing to do with James! While reading and trying to rationalize why this trauma is occuring, I have prayed for your family--without knowing every detail, it feels unjustified! Hopefully you will be able to do something about this once Lee is free of all restrictions, to prevent this from happening to other innocent parties! I have lived both lives, Lizzie, and I know your loneliness. One must experience it to truly know it. Even now, with my dh's work arrangement, when he is gone, I feel an echo of being a single mother. But this time, with four children instead of one, LOL! I continue to pray for you all and hope that you will be reunited soon! :)Hugs, Kat I am glad to hear that Lee’s offense had nothing to do with James! While reading and trying to rationalize why this trauma is occuring, I have prayed for your family–without knowing every detail, it feels unjustified! Hopefully you will be able to do something about this once Lee is free of all restrictions, to prevent this from happening to other innocent parties!

I have lived both lives, Lizzie, and I know your loneliness. One must experience it to truly know it. Even now, with my dh’s work arrangement, when he is gone, I feel an echo of being a single mother. But this time, with four children instead of one, LOL!

I continue to pray for you all and hope that you will be reunited soon!
:) Hugs,
Kat

]]> By: Joy http://adustyframe.com/2008/12/01/questions/comment-page-1/#comment-69417 Joy Wed, 03 Dec 2008 16:14:33 +0000 http://adustyframe.com/?p=1637#comment-69417 Hey! It's been a while since I left a comment. Praying for you guys!!! All three of you have been such a great testimony to me. Tell the little bugger I said "hi"...that's James by the way, not Lee..ha, ha, ha!!! We'll have to talk sometime. Maybe one of these days we'll get conected. Hey! It’s been a while since I left a comment. Praying for you guys!!! All three of you have been such a great testimony to me. Tell the little bugger I said “hi”…that’s James by the way, not Lee..ha, ha, ha!!!

We’ll have to talk sometime. Maybe one of these days we’ll get conected.

]]> By: Jenn http://adustyframe.com/2008/12/01/questions/comment-page-1/#comment-69171 Jenn Tue, 02 Dec 2008 19:27:04 +0000 http://adustyframe.com/?p=1637#comment-69171 I fell a bit behind on reading my blog feeds with the holiday weekend - but I have been thinking of your family and this very situation. I was sorely tempted to email you this morning and ask if there had been an update on the parole officer's decision - but I suppose this post answers that. :( What Lee did isn't any of our business and doesn't really matter - what is important is how he has transformed his life since then! How wonderful is that?! Your grace and patience with this situation never ceases to amaze me. It would be so easy to fall into despair and bitter anger - or worse, break the rules that make no sense at all. I've been keeping this in my prayers over the Thanksgiving weekend - to give you all the strength and peace you need until the day your family can be together under the same roof again. I fell a bit behind on reading my blog feeds with the holiday weekend – but I have been thinking of your family and this very situation. I was sorely tempted to email you this morning and ask if there had been an update on the parole officer’s decision – but I suppose this post answers that. :(

What Lee did isn’t any of our business and doesn’t really matter – what is important is how he has transformed his life since then! How wonderful is that?!

Your grace and patience with this situation never ceases to amaze me. It would be so easy to fall into despair and bitter anger – or worse, break the rules that make no sense at all.

I’ve been keeping this in my prayers over the Thanksgiving weekend – to give you all the strength and peace you need until the day your family can be together under the same roof again.

]]> By: theprincessofquitealot http://adustyframe.com/2008/12/01/questions/comment-page-1/#comment-69169 theprincessofquitealot Tue, 02 Dec 2008 19:13:41 +0000 http://adustyframe.com/?p=1637#comment-69169 I'm so glad that many people in your church are supportive and are sharing this burden too....and I too hear those comments frequently about "being a single mom" when their husband is away. In some ways, I wonder if people make these comments to help themselves relate more to single moms or to try to put themselves in a single mom's shoes..... I’m so glad that many people in your church are supportive and are sharing this burden too….and I too hear those comments frequently about “being a single mom” when their husband is away. In some ways, I wonder if people make these comments to help themselves relate more to single moms or to try to put themselves in a single mom’s shoes…..

]]> By: Mama Hen http://adustyframe.com/2008/12/01/questions/comment-page-1/#comment-69119 Mama Hen Tue, 02 Dec 2008 12:44:22 +0000 http://adustyframe.com/?p=1637#comment-69119 Lizzie, I prayed specifically for the parole officer this morning. I prayed God would change her heart and her thinking. Thank you for sharing. Lizzie,
I prayed specifically for the parole officer this morning. I prayed God would change her heart and her thinking. Thank you for sharing.

]]> By: TransitionGirl http://adustyframe.com/2008/12/01/questions/comment-page-1/#comment-69032 TransitionGirl Tue, 02 Dec 2008 02:04:02 +0000 http://adustyframe.com/?p=1637#comment-69032 I'm sorry -- I don't know how it feels to be in a situation like this and I don't mean to imply anything other than frustration. It just doesn't make sense... but I guess what the Lord does doesn't always make sense. That's why it's called Trust. And I agree with the rest -- you don't owe any of us any explanation. I'll keep praying for your family. Esp that you all will continue to find refuge in the Lord and not let the bitterness and frustration overwhelm. I’m sorry — I don’t know how it feels to be in a situation like this and I don’t mean to imply anything other than frustration. It just doesn’t make sense… but I guess what the Lord does doesn’t always make sense. That’s why it’s called Trust.

And I agree with the rest — you don’t owe any of us any explanation. I’ll keep praying for your family. Esp that you all will continue to find refuge in the Lord and not let the bitterness and frustration overwhelm.

]]> By: Ame http://adustyframe.com/2008/12/01/questions/comment-page-1/#comment-68985 Ame Mon, 01 Dec 2008 23:59:48 +0000 http://adustyframe.com/?p=1637#comment-68985 " or that they should be more thoughtful " oops or that the shouldN'T be more thoughtful! ” or that they should be more thoughtful ”

oops

or that the shouldN’T be more thoughtful!

]]> By: Ame http://adustyframe.com/2008/12/01/questions/comment-page-1/#comment-68983 Ame Mon, 01 Dec 2008 23:58:22 +0000 http://adustyframe.com/?p=1637#comment-68983 "It may be rough but being a single mom is completely unimaginable." yes. and it's something i don't want anyone to ever have to imagine, either. *** Lizzie - i love you and support you and your family. it is so hard. i have struggled with comments like these, too. but when i was married, i did have a husband who traveled a lot. it took years to get used to. thing is, it's a different "mindset." when married with a husband living at home, a wife has that mindset. when a single mom, our mindset changes because it MUST change; we have no choice. i think the flip-flop of the mindset for short durations is difficult to deal with in it's own sorta way. there are two different routines that must be created ... one for him home, and one for him gone. there's the adjustment when he leaves and the adjustment when he returns. when he's gone over about three days, the routine changes ... then when he comes home again, the readjustment is even more difficult. as you know well, i am NOT saying your life or mine is easier or that they should be more thoughtful ... i am saying that there is another way to look at it sometimes. i do keep up with your writing several times a week :) “It may be rough but being a single mom is completely unimaginable.”

yes. and it’s something i don’t want anyone to ever have to imagine, either.

***

Lizzie – i love you and support you and your family. it is so hard.

i have struggled with comments like these, too. but when i was married, i did have a husband who traveled a lot. it took years to get used to. thing is, it’s a different “mindset.” when married with a husband living at home, a wife has that mindset. when a single mom, our mindset changes because it MUST change; we have no choice. i think the flip-flop of the mindset for short durations is difficult to deal with in it’s own sorta way. there are two different routines that must be created … one for him home, and one for him gone. there’s the adjustment when he leaves and the adjustment when he returns. when he’s gone over about three days, the routine changes … then when he comes home again, the readjustment is even more difficult.

as you know well, i am NOT saying your life or mine is easier or that they should be more thoughtful … i am saying that there is another way to look at it sometimes.

i do keep up with your writing several times a week :)

]]> By: Chel http://adustyframe.com/2008/12/01/questions/comment-page-1/#comment-68964 Chel Mon, 01 Dec 2008 23:23:04 +0000 http://adustyframe.com/?p=1637#comment-68964 I am now and have always been very impressed with how gracefully you are handling all of this. I cannot imagine how difficult it is for you to be both alone in this and not alone. It must be a very difficult line for you to walk at times. I am so certain that God is using you in ways that you can't see now but that will be so very obvious later. I am now and have always been very impressed with how gracefully you are handling all of this. I cannot imagine how difficult it is for you to be both alone in this and not alone. It must be a very difficult line for you to walk at times.

I am so certain that God is using you in ways that you can’t see now but that will be so very obvious later.

]]> By: deputyheadmistress http://adustyframe.com/2008/12/01/questions/comment-page-1/#comment-68892 deputyheadmistress Mon, 01 Dec 2008 21:45:59 +0000 http://adustyframe.com/?p=1637#comment-68892 I agree that whatever he did is not our business. I am so frustrated on your behalf, and I know that can't even compare with how YOU feel on your family's behalf. When my husband was active duty he would be overseas for two months at a time- and gone for short trips (two weeks at a time) several times during the year. I always said a special prayer for single mothers during that time, because I knew that while it was hard, it still wasn't anything like what 'real' single moms go through- he loved us, he could call us, the children could understand it was the job that took their daddy away, not something he had chosen to do (other than the fact that he did choose that career, but that's still different), we had his income, and I knew the date when it would all be over, just to begin the list. I am so sorry= I can't imagine what you're going through, and not even to have a reason for it is beyond frustrating. It would be very hard not to be bitter, especially when it might seem the only reason for it is just because somebody has the power to do this and is flexing muscles. I agree that whatever he did is not our business. I am so frustrated on your behalf, and I know that can’t even compare with how YOU feel on your family’s behalf.
When my husband was active duty he would be overseas for two months at a time- and gone for short trips (two weeks at a time) several times during the year. I always said a special prayer for single mothers during that time, because I knew that while it was hard, it still wasn’t anything like what ‘real’ single moms go through- he loved us, he could call us, the children could understand it was the job that took their daddy away, not something he had chosen to do (other than the fact that he did choose that career, but that’s still different), we had his income, and I knew the date when it would all be over, just to begin the list.

I am so sorry= I can’t imagine what you’re going through, and not even to have a reason for it is beyond frustrating.

It would be very hard not to be bitter, especially when it might seem the only reason for it is just because somebody has the power to do this and is flexing muscles.

]]>