She’s Proud of Me

by adustyframe ~ May 12th, 2009

Lee’s parole officer told me she’s proud of me. “Well, if I get to be proud of you.”

She’s glad I’m going to the classes she sent me to and that I’m following through and trying to work on things.

I told her that of course I’m willing to do what it takes to have my family together.

When I first started the classes, the facilitator told me that the parole officer thought I was a little mousey and unable to care for myself. She thought I was a bit of a “yes man” never telling Lee anything he doesn’t want to hear and only doing what Lee wants.

(Insert belly laughs here.)

Lee said, “I wish you were like that!” as he laughed. The truth is I’m far from it but she didn’t know me very well. I think she took the “Stay at home, homeschooling mom, Christian wife” stereotype and ran with it.

Lee has told her how hard I’ve been on him. I’ve tried to open up to her a bit more and not be so wary and cynical. Perhaps being brutally honest has helped.

I still am not sure where we’ll be at the end of Lee’s programs. But at least we’re showing her the truth about our family and perhaps that will go a little way toward influencing her decisions.

In any case she’s proud of me and I’m pretty sure that’s not a bad thing.



18 Thoughts Shared to She’s Proud of Me

  1. Jenn

    A mousey yes-man? Oh Lizzie that made me laugh!


  2. Pam

    I know that being skeptical comes with her
    job…BUT….how arrogant to think she can
    really “know” you when she hasn’t really
    spent time with you….Lizzie I am beginning to think that meeting her and having her “witness” your genuine love of Christ is
    the biggest benefit of your whole ordeal!!
    God Bless, Pam, South Bend

    Thanks, Pam:) ((hugs))

  3. Tonya

    That is absolutely not a bad thing.You and yours are still in our prayers here:)

  4. Lisa

    Keep on being the real you! God alone knows the plans he has for BOTH you and Lee.

  5. ashley @ twentysixcats

    That’s exciting! I’m sure being on the good side of Lee’s parole officer helps. 🙂 I hope God’s able to show Himself through you and through this trial to all the people who need him! 🙂

  6. Marie

    The fact that you’ve been so patient (as well as principled) for this long speaks volumes about your character. What goes around comes around.

  7. Christy

    That’s good news. And how good that she is witnessing your transparency and your family’s hard work of moving toward the goal of togetherness. This also reminds me not to get worked up and insecure when others around me label me inappropriately … but instead to just push forward steady and true to God’s leading, resting in His favor. Thanks again for sharing here, Lizzie … we love to hear how things are going. ((Hugs))

    Well, I can’t say I’ve never gotten worked up;0!

  8. Chel

    Someone being proud of you is ALWAYS a good thing. Congratulations to you!

  9. Jacque

    Well, I sure am proud of you.


  10. kristie

    That is definitely a good thing!! =)

    They are sending me to counseling, not classes, but it still seems weird… I would have thought they were optional, since we are not the ones that did anything wrong…? I wish I could understand what is going on in my situation, I feel totally in the dark. Although it sounds a little bit similar to what is happening to your family.

    Can/ will the courts really tell us we have to do these things in order to have our families back together? And if we do, then we are free and clear again? This is a strange new world for me and really confusing!!

    I really struggled with going because you’re right. I didn’t do anything. She technically can’t make me but I decided if going looks good then I’ll go.
    Free and clear? Well 😉 as long as they’re on probation we’re never free and clear. And while I understand that that is actually a good thing, it’s still not fun.

  11. kristie

    PS I have not forgotten about the clothes. I am working on filling up a box!! =)

  12. Ame

    wow wee wow wow!

    amazing where a compliment will come from that will stick in our heart 🙂

  13. Susanna

    squeak squeak! But wonderful to hear given the negative impact she has had in the past 🙂

  14. TransitionGirl

    oh boy. the parole officer sure doesn’t know u at all! but’s its okay. you can pleasantly surprise her.. and show her that being a home-schooling, christian mom doesn’t mean you’re push-over. One doesn’t need to be LOUD to be strong. 😀

  15. jodi

    This is probably my own frustration, but why, may I ask, does your husband’s parole officer have the authority (or gall) to “send” YOU to any classes?

    I thought parole requirements were for the convicted, not the innocent spouses.

    I’m glad she’s proud of you, I really am, because I see how it could ultimately help you, and I totally understand the desire to do anything it takes to have your family together…….I’m just weary of the government making people, especially innocent people, jump through hoops under the guise of not being “good enough” in their eyes, without ever finding out first who you really are….

    You’re right that she can’t really make me go, but she basically said if I didn’t go she’d hold it against Lee. So….

  16. Barbara H.

    Unable to care for yourself — what does she think you’ve been DOING all this time?! And what would that, even if true, have to do with Lee’s situation?! I kind of agree with Pam’s comments — it’s frustrating that this woman’s judgment can be so far off and yet the fate of your family (from a human standpoint) is in her hands. But it does help when she has a favorable view, so I am glad God is letting her develop that.

  17. katrina

    When have you ever been ‘mousey’???? Bek could second that!!!!

    Can I say, “I HATE steriotypes!!!!!!!” Why does she think you need to go to classes? What are they trying to teach you?

    Don’t forget that there are still many out here in this world who love you and are praying for you.

    Update: My application is almost done and I will be mailing it off this week. I believe we need more Christians in law enforcement. I’m applying to two counties and if I’m accepted, I would be starting out working in a county jail. I will know more in June or July.

    Thanks;) The classes are basic stuff.
    I’m so thankful for your friendship and prayers.

    It will be interesting to see how being in law enforcement affects you views. Maybe we can talk about it:). I know that being in law enforcement is a tough job and I’m sure it’s really easy to become jaded because people are just so evil.

  18. Katherine

    This is bizarre. If you knew that his future depended upon her opinion of you, you could have avoided ever meeting her! Crazy system!