by adustyframe ~ July 15th, 2010

Twice in the past week, I’ve been somewhere that brought back powerful memories. It’s interesting to me that it’s often a part of a place that brings back the memories.

One was the church where Lee and I were married. James goes to their VBS each morning this week. Yesterday when I dropped him off, I had to wait outside while kids were checking in. I looked down at the step I was standing on and smiled.

I have a photo of Lee and I on that very step right after our wedding. It was windy and my veil is blowing everywhere and I’m trying to get a hold of it and we’re both smiling at someone.

I thought how crazy it was to see an old stair in need of paint and be reminded of that moment.

Last weekend, James and I went to the local Saturday Farmer’s Market. We looked around at all the veggies. We chatted with a friend. We bought a homemade egg roll.

Stopping at the Farmer’s Market is one of James’ favorite things to do on a summer Saturday.

The Farmer’s Market is in the parking lot of a municipal building and the bathroom for public use is next door in a courthouse. I had to run in to use the facilities.

I walked down the hall towards the bathroom. I knew this was the courtroom where Lee was sentenced. It didn’t really matter to me. I needed to use the bathroom.

Then I saw the bench outside the courtroom. I sat there trying to be composed that day. My Pastor standing near me telling me it’s ok to cry and my stubborn pride not allowing myself to fall apart in public.

When I saw the bench, something in me pulled me towards it. I wanted to go sit down and cry all the tears I didn’t let myself cry.

I didn’t.

James was with me and other people were around. But, I was surprised at the powerful emotions.

I went home and cried that night. Not because seeing a bench made me sad but because of all we’ve been through.

I cried because it just plain old hurts sometimes.

I cried because it makes me sad.

I cried because I’m so thankful that we’ve made it this far.

I cried because God is so good.

All because I saw a bench.

Memories are amazing things aren’t they?


3 Thoughts Shared to Memories

  1. Lisa

    Memories can be overwhelming. I can’t listen to a song that was played at my Dad’s funeral without crying. I’ve never, ever driven down one road since my son was in the mental hospital there years ago for a very, very brief stay. It’s ok to cry–it helps you heal.

  2. quilly

    Memories are amazing things. This morning the scent and steam from a cup of tea transported me to the other end of this convenient and for just a moment I was sitting at the breakfast table in Guatemala while our pastor said blessings over a breakfast I actually ate 5 years ago.

    A couple of days ago when my sister and my cousins were here from the briefest moment both my Gram and my Aunt were still alive and well and with us — and then we were crying over people 20 years dead. Even through the tears, those were wonderful memories to relieve.

  3. Janet

    Bless your heart, Lizzie. You’ve gone through so much. What a testimony you’ve been for the Lord.

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