by adustyframe ~ August 31st, 2010

I have a few dear friends that I consider to be Titus 2 women in my life. They’re older than I am–farther along their journey. They have many years of walking with the Lord and always have such wisdom.

One of these friends took me out to eat this summer so we could catch up. We went to a place that was new to me.

We had fun chatting and catching up. We talked about little things.

I knew that she wanted to talk with me about her recent loss. Her little granddaughter passed away after a long battle with cancer this spring.

I didn’t want to bring it up and thought perhaps she just wanted a break from talking about it.

When we left the restaurant, she said, “Can I show you her pictures?” I said of course.

We sat down at the outside eating area and she showed me the photos. Some were of the little girl when she was healthier. Some were taken when she was very ill.

She told me about their Make A Wish trip. She shared the things they did to make her more comfortable at the end and how she responded to the call on the day her granddaughter died.

She started to cry and said, “I’m sorry I’m burdening you with this.”

I told her she wasn’t burdening me at all and I was honored that she shared this with me.

It made me sad that we feel that sharing our grief is a burden to others. I know I’ve felt that way before.

I’ve never dealt with her type of loss, but I surely know what grief  and loss feels like. I know how difficult it is to share and how it’s not easy to know who can be trusted when you are finally ready to open up.

I wrote her a note later thanking her for dinner and thanking her for sharing the photos with me.

I wonder though why it’s so difficult for us to admit we’re grieving? Is it an American thing? Is it pride? Is it past hurts? I just don’t know, but I think that we as a society need to collectively work on this!

People suffering tremendous grief shouldn’t feel guilty about sharing it.


2 Thoughts Shared to Grief

  1. Robin in New Jersey

    I agree with you, Lizzie. I was going through a terrible time of grief back in January and February and I kept it from everyone. The person hadn’t died, but was in a very bad place and I couldn’t see her. I was angry and in a really bad place spiritually, emotionally and physically. If I had shared with someone, maybe things would have been easier for me.

  2. Diane

    I am also a single homeschooling mother… it’s truly a unique journey, isn’t it? I have known the Hand of God so much more distinctly and seen it move more clearly in my life in the last ten years of my life than in all the 42 years preceding. God is good♥

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